5/13/2013. - Day 48 - A Day in the Life of Naperville. Pitfalls in Shopping. And Patrick ruins my life.

 5/13/13. - Day 48 -
A Day in the Life of Naperville. Pitfalls in Shopping. And Patrick ruins my life.

Today we all piled into the car early to take off for the York Mall. Well, Patty, Lana and I wanted to go to the mall. Grandpa and Patrick probably were not excited for this trip. We started at Von Maur which has now become my favorite department store. I was previously blind to its existence and now am smitten. Lots of lovelies there that wanted to be taken home with me. Having no job makes that a hard experience.

We went to D.O.C. for lunch where the Bridger’s are basically famous. We enjoyed sampling a great many items and then left the boys alone again to fend for themselves while we shopped just a little bit more. I think Patty took some pity on the boys at this point, and suggested they explore the outdoor store in our absence.

Forever 21 occupied a lot of our time but did not ultimately take any weight off our wallets. We poked around the mall a bit more and then decided to call our chauffeurs for a ride back home. Scratch that—a ride to downtown Naperville for more shopping.

This drive was the best part of the day in my opinion. And at the same time the worst. While waiting at a long stop light, we noticed a young gentleman in the car beside us. We couldn't see much of him so we put in a request for our driver to inch up a bit so we were even with his car beside us. Upon closer examination, a handsome young specimen occupied this car. It might not seem like it, but you can deduce a lot about someone from only being able to view a portion of them (the side of their face and one arm) and a small area of their car. We observed a cross hanging from the mirror which we assumed placed him somewhere in the faith of God. He was rapidly tapping his fingers so he was clearly enjoying some sort of music, which is great. The car was older but the interior was not cluttered, so presumably he's not too messy. And we also decided he was fairly tall given the length of his arm that protruded out of the driver side window and kept the beat of the music as he drummed his fingers on the door.  As we discussed what his and my children would one day look like, Lana became emboldened and rolled down her window. In doing this, she sent Patty and I into squeals and shrieks of terror, as we feared she planned to proposition to him directly right out of her window. We had made a show of talking big about how we might wave him down or have someone beckon him from the car, but Lana called our bluff as soon as she hit the window button.  After the light changed and we began moving, she revealed that she simply wanted to know what type of music he was listening to and was going to inquire. Since she couldn't even hear it, we then declared another observation and concluded that he was a very considerate individual who does not blare his music and subject those around him to the sound unwillingly.

As we drove on and the gentleman's Saturn began to lose ground behind us, I encouraged Patrick to be more strategic about this and slow down so that we could once again be even with my future husband's car. Patrick did not see the worth in this idea and continued on. Patrick, when given a chance, will choose speed over someone's fate apparently. As his foot pressed further into the pedal, I continued to protest. I then threatened that Patrick could be responsible for my eventual spinsterhood if he kept up his behavior. This did not deter him and he completely blew off my date with destiny from a car window in Illinois. My life is potentially ruined and Patrick is carefree.

Fine, I said. You can buy my first can of cat food.

The gentlemen dropped us off downtown and departed, after Patty strictly instructed them to empty the trunk of all of our shopping bags from our previous stop and carry them into the house. Patrick replied, “you guys plan to walk back home, right?” Ha. Yes we do and luckily it’s only a few blocks.

We made a few more stops are various boutiques downtown that were either missed yesterday or warranted revisiting. I was still coveting a dress with navy stripes and a bright coral accent ribbon from a store we cased yesterday. Upon returning I had to try it on. Now the thing about shopping with Lana and Patty Bridger is this: They have amazing taste, they shop at all the stores I would shop at, and this is a dangerous combination. We had already been through several scenarios where I would try things on and ask for their opinion and it was always positive, it looks great, you need that.

Now maybe I do need all those things, or at least I want all those things I tried on. And possibly they do look quite nice because far be it from Lana and Patty to be untruthful—but I also have in the back of my mind the reality that I have no job which equals no dollars. This again is a frustrating concept when you like to shop as much as I do. The Grindens and the Bridgers love food and we have discussed today that you either eat to live, or live to eat. I eat to live and I don’t care much else for food unless it’s cheesecake or PB&J. On the other hand, these folks live to eat. I more or less eat to live, and subsequently live to shop. So again, this predicament with the nice clothes and the great shopping companions coupled with the wallet that is short of funds was so unfortunate.

So I try on the dress I have been lusting after for the last 24 hours and again the dynamic duo exclaims over it’s beauty. I love it too. But I also threaten them that I will try on something ugly next just to make sure they are being honest. Lana comes back with an awesome surprise that the dress is my birthday present! I'm overwhelmed with gratitude at such an unexpected gesture. When we return home Lana asks grandpa if he would like to see the dress he got me for my birthday. Ok, it’s a surprise gift for me and a complete surprise to grandpa. But he approves J.

Later we enjoy chatting and relaxing and just generally enjoying each other’s company. Patty makes sure the tunes are rocking so that it can be confirmed she is well versed in her musical selections. Patty and I share a love of music so this cannot really be a better situation-- being surround by great people and great music. A hour or so passes before grandpa and Patrick are again hungry, so they take orders for hot dogs. When they return the girls take to the basement with our food and tune into The Voice. Before I go to the basement I spy grandpa with a jug of chocolate milk. Upon requesting some I am instructed that I may have a small amount. Grandpa loves chocolate milk so it’s probably impressive that I am allowed any of his half gallon riches. He pours me my allotment and I descend into the basement to join the ladies. Later, as we are holed up downstairs, he reappears carrying the jug and empties the contents into my glass and then silently returns upstairs. For those of you who know John Grinden, you can appreciate this simple gesture for much more than it appears. My Grandpa is sort of a special dude.

We spend the rest of the evening critiquing the sounds and wardrobe choices of the individuals on The Voice. We are not regular watchers so we make up our theories on some of the aspects of the show and just generally enjoy the vocalists. Patty and Lana are exploring old photo albums where they “look so young” and other such things (Patty and Lana still look "so young" in my opinion).

Relaxing at the Bridger's house, I take time to sink into my thoughts and reflect. I am finding out that I am lucky as a grandchild to have so much time with my grandparents, and more, so many great memories and the opportunity to get to know their friends and share in so many experiences with them. I share this with Lana and Patty and then reflect on the other side of the coin. They remark that while they can see why I’m glad we are all able to spend so much time together and have become so close-- the downfall is that I am now also privy to their shenanigans on their various trips. I believe the next time I am allowed to spend time with this group, I may be asked to sign something to the effect of "what happens here, stays here. Or else."

The night winds down with some Skype with Jamie- we've been apart over 48 hours now so withdrawals are setting in. We rehash my Saturday night escapade with unnamed male and comment on how ridiculous the whole thing is. I also talk with Dodger a bit about protecting the house from cockroaches and spiders, and about having some regard for that dang tennis ball instead of losing it all the time. I can’t believe only two days ago I was luxuriously basking on the beach in 85 plus weather and then arrived on the Notre Dame campus to a frost warning and 40 degrees with a need to dig out my winter jacket. NOT COOL. But today was a little warmer (60?) so I’m holding out hope for some sunshine in the cities tomorrow when I'm back on the road. 

5/12/2013. - Day 47 - You have to be really careful around here, a party could break out at any time: Meet the Bridger's.

5/12/2013. - Day 47 -You have to be really careful around here, a party could break out at any time.

Meet the Bridger's.

Sunday morning at Notre Dame comes early, and cool. Ingrid has a fantastic surprise of cheesecake for breakfast. Well...sort of. She had the cheesecake and I had the surprise that we should eat it for breakfast. It took a little convincing but she soon agreed.

After a quick hug, I am back on the road, bound for Chicago, or rather, for Naperville. It's a bright sunny Sunday, and it's also Mother's Day. While I'm not able to spend it with my mother--I am spending it with one of my sort of "mothers"--my grandma, Lana. My grandpa will also be there along with their friends, the Bridger's, whom I have heard great tales about but have never met.

I am passing through an increasing number of tollways. I don't really know how to approach them...Not all of the passages have places you can pay, and some do, but then I don't have change, or I'm already in the wrong lane, etc. It's just a lot of added confusion and anxiety that I really don't desire. One hundred+ confusing toll roads later, I arrive in Naperville, a suburb of Chicago, at the Bridger's home. It's a fantastic historic home, and the welcoming party is out on the steps, all smiles. We all pile into the Bridger's car and head for a venue that's providing a hearty Mother's Day brunch.

After stuffing ourselves with delicious breakfast/brunch items, and after the ladies had received their "mother's" roses, we moved on. (Sidenote: I was offered a "mother's" rose.  Sometimes I'm sort of a mother, to my previous foster kids, to my sisters, and sometimes I have to be the mom to my friends...but right now I'm just a kid who probably needs all of the various "moms' in my life at the moment as I navigate this particular curve in the road...Needless to say, when they came around distributing roses and asked if I was a mother, I politely shook my head and declined the rose. All in good time.)

Downtown Naperville is a gold mine of cute little shops. As the journey goes on and I get more and more poor, these shopping trips still entice me. I'm just more and more empty handed at the end of them.

After shopping we return to Bridger's for a bit of a social hour. I am determined to go to an evening church service and after consulting the internet, determine that there is a 6 o'clock service just down the road. If I hurry I can make it, so I grab my keys and take off.

After driving around endlessly, finding the church, realizing the internet was wrong about the time of the service (isn't everything on the internet true?), and then seeking out my 2nd, 3rd, 4th, and 5th backup churches, I had to give up and return to the Bridger's without any salvation for the day. Grim. But a solid effort.

Social hour(s) continues and some back story surfaces on the Bridger's and how they came to be associated with the Grinden's. Patrick also gives the story of how they came to reside in this particular neighborhood, fondly stating that when they first moved onto this block, you had to be "very careful," as "a party could break out at ANY TIME."

I very much like the Bridger's.

Patty and Lana have decided without my consent that I must stay another night. I had originally only planned on staying Sunday night and leaving Monday, but they have now come to the consensus that I must stick around for one more night. I gladly accept. These are the kind of people one could spend days of adventures with and never stop laughing. I will not turn down this type of opportunity.

Patrick has been joking for some time about the "biker bar" down the block, Orazio Pub. He has linked the motorcycle in the back of my pickup and the idea that "my people" may be just down the street. One way or another this leads to us realizing we have not yet had supper, and then my suggesting we go eat with the bikers.

The food at Orazio is quite good; unfortunately, despite Patrick's description of bikes frequently being parked all around that place, there are no bikes in sight. But our bellies are full.

5/11/2013. - Day 46 - Feel my way through the darkness, guided by a beating heart. I can't tell where the journey will end, but I know where to start... Headed west through the Cumberland Gap...

5/11/2013. - Day 46 - Feel my way through the darkness, guided by a beating heart. I can't tell where the journey will end, but I know where to start...

Headed west through the Cumberland Gap.

The final morning in Charleston dawns hot and humid, of course. Since I was already up til this morning, the second time I wake up it's time to leave. I bid Jamie and Dodger goodbye, something we are growing accustomed to and something that is less and less sad on this trip. I usually say "see ya next time!" because it feels so much more optimistic than "goodbye."

Today's route will cover a ton of ground: South Carolina, North Carolina, Tennessee, Kentucky, Ohio, and finally, Indiana. I'm meeting my cousin, Ingrid, at the Notre Dame Campus. She will graduate in just a few days so we will get an evening of cousin time in tonight.

This is about a 13 hour trip. I feel like I decided weeks ago not to drive that much in one day anymore...But I guess I also decided to stay in Charleston an extra day so this is my penance. The scenery is gorgeous today and quite different from what I've driven through the last couple weeks. I pass through the Smoky Mountains and then move onto the Cumberland Gap. The views are breathtaking, with green as far as the eye can see and roads that wind through the land and carve out pathways through the mountains.

As I move towards Ohio and Indiana, there are gorgeous views of the sunsets from many of the bridges that connect city to city and allow for some bonus evening aesthetics. As the sun sets, the drive is getting long. I am also noticing that the temperature gauge seems to be broken, because when I left his morning it was about 83°---and it's now reading 38°.




It's not broken. And this is why I decided to stay on the coast one more precious warm day: Because I knew exactly what was waiting for me in the Midwest.

When I finally navigate the Ford to the Notre Dame Campus, Ingrid comes out to greet me in the parking lot--in her winter jacket. Unbelievable. Yesterday I was lying on a beach listening to the ocean. Today I want to lie on the ground and throw a tantrum. Before we can trek back to Ingrid's dorm, I have to root around the pickup to try to find some sort of a jacket and something warm to wear. I'm pretty sure I was wearing shorts during the drive--not because I'm naive and didn't check the weather; but because I'm optimistic and sort of stubborn.


We arrive at Ingrid's dorm building, and she and the other seniors are dwelling in the belly of the old structure in a dungeon sort of setting. It's creepy and cool at the same time, and also sort of nostalgic and for just a second I miss Selke Hall and UND. Wait, no, I miss meal plans at the Wilkerson. Nevermind.

I'm camping in the floor tonight in my sleeping bag and catching up on life with Ingrid before we both drift off to sleep. Ingrid is kind of awesome and after she graduates from Notre Dame she's going to med school.  And I'm unemployed.